“What You Think About Comes About”

by CHERYL GNAD on January 18, 2019

Found on Facebook Notes too! : SOCIAL FOCUS BY CHERYL GNAD·TUESDAY, JANUARY 1, 2019

Positive Mental Attitude Journal coaching / Social Focus by CG

Recently, I was in conversation with a young lady. She never seems to be depressed about anything, She seemed to have a positive mental attitude. Yet she still struggled to view life in a positive way…day to day. She does experience the joys of each day. As she looks forward to “tomorrow” (no further than tomorrow, it seems) she sees struggle, frustration, being tired, stressed, lack of accomplishment, lack of recognition, nothing to look forward to without it being expensive, and that things are just beyond her reach. Because of this “outlook”, she suffers physical stress on her body and now she has health problems.

Many her age consider this as “adulting”, just a normal stage of their life. But must it be the “norm” of your daily living? No. What can she do? What can anyone do? People of all ages and stages in their life face disappointments, failure and struggles. Yet, you see others who seem unfazed by it all. How can the young lady above become positive in her daily outlook?

Positive, yet still suffering negative…

I, myself, was one who “looked” positive and even sounded positive, but that very “positivity” caused me much grief! Yes, believe it or not! I felt like I had to measure my every step towards success. If it didn’t happen as I had planned, I had failed in some way. I soon saw myself as lacking successes all around and looked for answers as to why in other people.

I gained some great and awesome understanding friends and mentors. Yet, as much as they wanted to help, I struggled in a big way interiorly. I believe I was even depressed from it. I found myself crying in moments of solitude and thoughtfulness. Why couldn’t I do the very things I KNEW would make me successful?! I had NO CLUE! I had very wise words spoken to me about P.M.A. – Positive Mental Attitude. It was a “theory” that I wanted to be true, but I saw it as a good “theory”.

I found some help

Eventually, I was fed up with my state of constant sadness and self-deprecation. I sought even deeper help of a lady that I met via social media first then in person. We met for lunch for the first time to get to know each other. It was 4+ hours later and we were fast of being friends. She was a Psycho-therapist and I was a social media manager/network marketer. This new friend was the first to say she totally understood my mental outlook. She knew what was going on with me, and that she could fix it. WOW!!! it can be fixed!?

I did therapy through her and another therapist and found out why I was suffering so. I had years and years of built up beliefs in my incapabilities. Outside confirmation by others led me to believe that it was so. I was taught that those belief systems that I attached myself to were LEARNED not inherited and that they could be unlearned or let go. It didn’t have to be so. I didn’t have to be weak, unsure, but yet talented. Believeing that I wasn’t able to perform at a high enough level to be of any good wasn’t necessary either. I didn’t have to question myself at every move wondering why or why not. Then end up saying it was “my fault” as if I had no other choice. It was my fault because I didn’t know I had a choice and could change my outcomes.

Positive Mental Self-Talk Is Not a theory but a science!

One book put me on the path of learning how to make changes in my life. That was What to Say When You Talk to Yourself, by Shad Helmstetter, Ph.D.. It showed me how my self-talk was often negative. I became aware of it. Yet, all of this was “theory” still for me. It felt good to ponder on the possibility of changing for the better but it didn’t sink in until AFTER my therapy sessions. The WHY of why I was the way I was, wasn’t a barrier to who I wanted to be anymore but the language of positive self-talk hadn’t become a habit yet. But it was becoming more and more so for the next 5 years! That is a long time.

Recently, I was introduced to another book – The Power of Neuro-plasticity, and again, it was by Shad Helmstetter!!! I knew the name! The person reviewing this book swore on its principals and the science on how your brain works to create your mindset. I had a health crisis a few years before that had rendered me with brain damage. I had been studying how the brain works so this book was NEXT on my list to read. So I read it. I then KNEW, with confidence, that a person’s (my own) mindset can change the outcomes in their life! I believed it because of the SCIENCE behind it. NO MORE THEORY!!!

Time to “rewire” the brain for positive thoughts?

So now I know what to say to this young lady. She needs to read this book – for sure. She needs to understand that she had created these “channels” or pathways of thought. These are then easily guided there because of pure habit. They often lead you to even a more NEGATIVE territory which becomes bigger and bigger with time. It is more work to move out of but you can. You can create pathways from the start with just the decision to make a new path with a positive thought. By making these changes you are REWIRING your brain. It will change your attitude about things, which will lead you to positive rewiring and new pathways again! It will bring you closer to your “norm” of positive thinking; something you thought nearly impossible. Now you are coming closer to having a Positve Mental Attitude. All you have to do is, to begin with, a positive thought —

“…previously dormant positive programs, chemically and electrically networked them together, gave you a burst of chemical stimulant, and immediately infused your attitude with a renewed sense of positive belief.”

…from The Power of Neuro-plasticity.

Have a change in…attitude!

So, by changing your attitude with P.M.A. (positive mental attitude) you can change the outcome of your thoughts! In working and reworking that channel of positive thought, you change the belief and then ADD to that channel of thought! It works on itself and produces MORE of what you would want. This isn’t a quick solution or answer to any problem, but just in knowing that “it isn’t stuck in cement!”, that is is fluid and changeable is hope enough for many folks!

Finding help with coaching

Sometimes you don’t know when you are “stuck” in the negative. It takes another caring individual (or a life-coach) to kindly put that mirror in front of you and give you a sense of hope. They can give gentle direction on how to change your thought patterns. I’ve recommended a simple therapy program before – coloring books! Today, that is easy and inexpensive. It will get those negative thoughts that are swirling around in your mind a chance to “vaporize”. You will begin to open up your mindfulness to planting more hopeful, positive thoughts that will get you further and give you energy. Try it! You will love the change it can bring!

Just a NOTE of cheer. I am sending you HAPPY NEW YEAR THOUGHTS which are being planted in my own mind for my future! Blessings to you all! Start practicing some P.M.A. – Positive Mental Attitude!

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Written by CHERYL GNAD

CHERYL GNAD

Cheryl Gnad, of owner/social media consultant with Social Focus by CG, offers coaching and consulting for small businesses looking to incorporate social media into their advertising strategies. She is a self-developed business owner, and a trained social media manager with names like Kate Buck Jr., Amy Porterfield, Kim Garst and Sandi Krakowski. Follow her on Facebook at Social Focus by CG, Twitter@SocialFocusbyCG, and on Linkedin.

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